What a 'No' Can Teach Us

No one gets into fundraising because they love hearing "no."   

Whether it's a grant proposal, a major gift, a corporate sponsorship, or a board recruitment conversation, every ask comes with the possibility that the answer won't be what we hoped. 

But deep down, we know it’s not that end of the story. 

And we know we shouldn't take it personally. It's something I remind myself of often. 

I'm not asking on behalf of myself. I'm asking on behalf of the mission. 

And when you think about it, the person saying no probably has a legitimate reason for it.
 

Sometimes, it’s not the right time. 
Sometimes, it’s truly budget. 
Sometimes, it just isn’t the right fit. 
Sometimes, priorities change. 
Sometimes, someone else simply has a deeper relationship. 

The important thing is to not allow it to stop you. 
Not to allow it to stifle your passion. 

That doesn't mean hearing "no" is easy. It isn't. 

Recently, I've experienced this from the other side as a business owner.

The first "no," I cried.
The second? I was surprisingly relieved because, looking back, I don't think it was the right fit after all.

But the thing is, the "no's" aren't getting easier.

I think I'm simply getting stronger.

There is a lesson in each no. 

Sometimes the lesson is about timing. Sometimes it's about strategy. And sometimes it's simply a reminder that not every opportunity is meant to be yours. 

We cannot take it personally.
We cannot allow it to diminish our confidence or make us question the value of our mission or our purpose. 

Every "no" teaches us something.
Every "yes" reminds us why we keep asking.

So don't let one answer stop you from making the next invitation.

Because somewhere out there is the donor, volunteer, board member, or partner who has been waiting to hear about your mission.

They can't say "yes" if they're never invited.

Keep asking. Keep building relationships. Keep believing in the work you do.

Because your mission is worth every courageous conversation.

New Hampshire Gives has come and gone. Now what?

Okay, New Hampshire Gives has come and gone. Now what? This is where the real work begins. Now’s the time to steward these donors in a deeper way.

Think about it. 

700+ nonprofits had their message out there this week. And they choose YOU.

So, let’s thank them for this.
Let’s learn more about who they are. 
Let’s make sure they are IN your database.

Let’s start there.

When participating in any Giving Day, most make you use a third-party platform, not yours. You must make sure you export the list of donors from their platform and put them in your CRM. You’d be surprised how many people miss this step and keep the data in the third-party platform.

Next, let’s find out if they’ve ever given to you before. 

If this is their first gift to you, we need to make note of this. I’d like to add a caveat here. If you don’t trust your data, and are not confident this is their first gift, do not call out in your communications to them “Thank you for your first gift.” This can leave a really bad taste in their mouth. However, if you are confident this is their first gift, acknowledge that with a handwritten note to them. 

People LOVE a handwritten note. I have heard time and time again how it is a lost art. One we must bring back.

If the donors on the list are repeat supporters, this is great. Ask yourself using the data these questions:

Is this an additional gift, not expected?
Did they increase their amount? 

If it is a yes to any of the above, write the handwritten note to them too, and make mention of this to them. Let them know you see them, and honor what they’re doing for your mission. 

And for anyone else that made a gift, what do you notice about their giving after looking at the data?

Have they been giving at the same level for years? Is it time to bring them in for a coffee or a tour? 

Were they a lapsed donor and now they’re back? If so, that’s amazing! Something you said within your campaign worked! Now write that handwritten note and welcome them back!

You see, personalized touchpoints are what brings your relationship with your donor to a whole new level. You need to tell them, because honestly, it’s true. You can’t do what you do without the support and dedication of your community. 

Okay, let’s pause. How does this feel? 

Overwhelming?
Inspiring?
Not sure how you’re going to get this done on top of EVERYTHING else?

I feel that.

So, this is where you lean into your team. Spoiler alert, that includes your volunteers and your board. Pull the information, get them the notecards, ask them to help. This is an easy way for them to support your fundraising efforts in a way that might feel more comfortable to them.

The truth is that stewardship doesn't have to be complicated.

It starts with noticing.

Noticing who gave. Noticing what changed. Noticing the people who continue to show up for your mission, year after year.

When donors feel seen, relationships deepen. And when relationships deepen, generosity grows.

As you look at your NH Gives results, I encourage you to spend just as much time on what happens after the gift as you did to prepare for the campaign itself.

Your donors chose you. Make sure they know how much that matters.

Not Sure You Have Time to Volunteer? Read This First.

April is known as Volunteer Appreciation Month.

A time when many nonprofits pause intentionally, to show deep gratitude for the people who make their work possible: volunteers.

People who give their time, energy, and heart to something bigger than themselves.

But if I’m being honest, I didn’t grow up understanding what community service really meant.

To me, as a kid, it was something you had to do when you got in trouble, not something you chose.

That perspective changed as a young adult when I was introduced to a local United Way chapter.

From that moment on, I began to understand the true meaning of service… and the powerful impact it can have, not just on a community, but on you.

When people think about volunteering, a few things usually come to mind.

Maybe it’s getting involved locally, supporting youth sports, Scouts, or serving on a municipal board.

Or maybe it’s through your workplace, joining a Day of Service or exploring board service opportunities alongside colleagues.

All of these are meaningful. All of them matter.

But today, I want to speak to a different group of people.

The ones who have thought about volunteering, but aren’t quite sure if they can commit.

I see you, and I respect that thoughtful hesitation.

Because here’s the truth:

Nonprofits rely on volunteers in ways many people don’t fully realize.

Often operating with small teams, these organizations depend on an “army” of volunteers to keep things moving, handling day to day tasks so the mission itself doesn’t stop.

But volunteering doesn’t have to mean overcommitting or stretching yourself too thin.

The best nonprofit organizations want to work with you, to help you find the right fit.

That starts with asking the right questions:

• What is the time commitment?

• Are there opportunities that match my availability?

• Can I involve my children or family?

• Is this a one time opportunity or ongoing support?

Clear, open communication from the beginning sets everyone up for success.

Because no one wants to step forward to help, only to feel like they’ve let someone down.

So take your time. Ask questions.

And don’t feel like you have to say yes to the first opportunity you find.

There are incredible resources that can help you explore options in a way that feels right for you, like Volunteer NH and Idealist, that are platforms designed to connect people with opportunities that align with their lives and interests.

And remember, volunteering doesn’t always look like showing up weekly.

It can look like:

• Organizing a diaper drive for a local shelter

• Collecting sunscreen for summer youth programs

• Rallying your workplace for a simple giving initiative

• Inviting your family into a shared act of service

There are so many ways to show up.

Nonprofits are essential to the fabric of our communities, especially here in New Hampshire.

But they can’t do it alone.

They need neighbors. Friends. Families. People like you and me.

So maybe this month isn’t just about appreciating volunteers.

Maybe it’s about becoming one.

Even in a small way.

Because when you find the right opportunity, one that meets you where you are, you may just discover that you’re receiving just as much as you’re giving.

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When is a Development Assessment Necessary?

What I have come to learn is that a Development Assessment can carry a bad reputation. When leaders hear the phrase, they often assume something is wrong. When in actuality, a Development Assessment is one of the most proactive and healthy steps a non-profit can take. 

You see, it isn’t about finding all the “faults”. It’s about confirming what’s working and identifying any opportunities that could take your fundraising even further. 

At its core, a Development Assessment can help answer one very important question: 

“What’s actually working in our fundraising, and what is quietly holding us back?”

Because to be honest, it’s never lack of passion or effort. 

And it certainly isn't a lack of mission. 

Sometimes it is simply unclear systems, or plateaued revenue despite so much hard work. 

Or it’s board members who care deeply about the organization, but just aren’t really sure how they can engage at a deeper level. 

In a lot of cases, it can be an overreliance on one funding stream, paired with donor fatigue. 

An assessment allows you to pause, take a step back and look at the bigger picture. 

What things do we look at through this Development Assessment lens? 

• What are your strategies and does your fundraising align with your mission and your long-term vision? Do you have goals? Are they clear and realistic? 

• Talk to me about your donor relationships and stewardship practices. What is your communication strategy and how are you personalizing them per donor segmentation? Is your fundraising program more transactional or relational? 

• How are your systems and infrastructure? First off, are they documented so if you win the Powerball (and of course make a major gift to your organization), that the team will continue to be able to move forward with the great work you all have built?  Is your CRM providing you the donor information you need in order to take your fundraising to the next level? How is the data integrity? 

• Let’s talk about your culture, in particular when it comes to philanthropy. What is your board involvement in philanthropy? Is there a willingness to be involved more? How is the internal understanding of the importance of philanthropy and how everyone in your organization can wear a development hat? 

• Is your revenue a diversified mix of streams? Not all grants; not all events; a sprinkle of individual donors and maybe some legacy gifts mixed in? What about non cash assets like stocks and beyond? 

You might be reading this and thinking, “Yes Pam, we have all of this covered.”

If so, that is wonderful! That tells me that you are leading with intention. Great job!!

And even then, there is always value in stepping back, to take a look and confirm that your foundation is solid - free of cracks - so you can continue to build with confidence. 

Or maybe you’re thinking…….. 

“It might actually be helpful to have someone from the outside take a look around.”  

At Rooted Giving, my goal is never to make anyone feel like they are doing something wrong. My goal is to enhance the great things you are already doing and help you raise additional, sustainable revenue. 

Non profits are doing extraordinary work - work our communities, families and neighbors rely on every single day. 

My role is to walk alongside you. 

To ensure your foundation is steady. 

To strengthen what is already good. 

To identify what could grow deeper. 

Because your mission matters too much. And as someone once told me, “Hope is not a strategy.” We must be intentional when it comes to fundraising. Especially if we want to create sustainable revenues, built off of trust and deep relationships with our donors. 

If you’re curious what this could look like for your organization, I’d love to start the conversation. We can jump on a call and talk it out any time! Click here to view my calendar and set something up. 

At the end of the day, please remember this one thing…….

A Development Assessment is not about pointing out flaws. It’s about strengthening the roots, so your impact can grow deeper, stronger and last even longer. We need you to be here — not just for today, but for years to come.

Your Board of Directors: An Extension of Your Fundraising Team

Boards of Directors carry many responsibilities in supporting a nonprofit organization. Over the next few weeks, I’d love to dig into some of those roles more deeply. 

No matter the size of your development team—whether you are a one-person shop or a department of ten or more—it’s essential to think about your Board of Directors as an extension of your fundraising team.

Let’s pause and reflect on what board members already bring to the table:

• They want your organization to succeed.

• They come with a sphere of influence.

• They bring genuine interest and passion for your mission.

When nonprofits approach board engagement with intention, these strengths become powerful assets.

Building a Board with Purpose

If your board is going to function as an extension of your fundraising efforts, a few key considerations matter:

Be strategic in recruitment.
Board members should align with the evolving needs of the organization. That alignment may include geography, professional skill sets, industry experience, or community connections. Being intentional about who you invite onto your board—and how they fill gaps collectively—is a critical step that many nonprofits overlook. (Don’t worry—we’ll dig deeper into this in a future post.)

Recognize different forms of philanthropic support.
Some board members are ready and able to support fundraising efforts directly. Others may contribute indirectly through their networks and influence. Often, board members don’t immediately recognize their own sphere of influence and need support in understanding how they can leverage it. Helping board members identify and grow into these roles is a responsibility nonprofits should embrace if they want boards set up for success.

Meet people where they are.
Let’s be honest—not everyone feels comfortable asking for money. That discomfort doesn’t mean they aren’t strong board members. Personally soliciting gifts is just one of many ways to support philanthropy. With thoughtful conversation and creativity, nonprofits can identify meaningful fundraising roles that align with board members’ comfort levels and availability.

It’s also important to remember that board members balance many responsibilities outside of their volunteer service—full-time jobs, families, and other community commitments. Sustainable engagement requires respecting those realities.

A strong board is built when nonprofits meet board members where they are, while clearly articulating what the organization needs to thrive.

A Resource for New Hampshire Nonprofits

If you’re based in New Hampshire, there’s an incredible opportunity worth sharing.

The New Hampshire Center for Nonprofits offers the Hoffman-Haas Fellowship, a program designed to prepare the next generation of nonprofit board leaders. This fellowship equips professionals with the knowledge, skills, and connections needed to serve as effective board members and strengthen communities across the state.

You can learn more about the program here: https://www.nhnonprofits.org/events/hoffman-haas-fellowship

Let’s Build Philanthropic Boards—Together

Building a philanthropic board is one of the most important investments a nonprofit can make. It’s also something I’m deeply passionate about.

If you’d like to explore how we might partner—whether around board development, fundraising strategy, or long-term donor relationships—I’d love to connect. I offer a free Discovery Call to learn more about your organization and see how Rooted Giving can support your work.